Saturday, January 9, 2010

What a Difference a Year Makes

I had a rough start to 2009. In no particular order, here are some of the tribulations I encountered:
~ Totaling my vehicle due to Arkansas ice storms
~ The windshield of my *new* vehicle being cracked by a flying rock
~ Finding out my work was closing and I was labeled with an "expiration date", going to be laid off
~ My hot water heater going out
~ My hot water heater catching fire
~ My hot water heater flooding my house
~ My septic tank flooded
~ I had horrible RA pains because I was still trying to find the right meds for me

What a difference a year makes...

Since all of those terrible things happened, I have had the following positive things in my life:
~ I received a job at one of the top teaching hospitals, and now I train med students and scientists
~ I moved to Dallas, where I'm closer to family than I've been in about nine years
~ I met the man I'm going to marry
~ My best friend got pregnant
~ My cousin had a healthy baby boy
~ I received a free trip to China for 5 weeks to train, so I got paid to be there
~ I am in the process of getting a roommate, which will help with bills
~ I received in the mail a letter basically telling me to claim $1000 that's mine

I have the following things to complain about: Chris working on a Saturday, waiting for 3 hours for the internet repair man, my dogs sitting on the couch... you get it. If that's the worst that it gets... my life is pretty amazing.

For Christmas, Chris bought me a CD by Josh Wilson, and I love it. I'm pretty sure the song I'm about to tell you of is actually being played on Christian radio, but I've got a little story to go with it. See, when you're feeling down, or going through a rough spot, I really don't think that all of those "inspirational" songs help much at all. It's like when you get a lot of mosquito bites, and you itch really bad, so someone tells you to stop scratching it for it to get better. I know that I need to stop scratching it, and I know that it will get better. But right then, I just want you to feel bad for me itching so much. BUT, I listen to this song now, and it's so amazing. It's so true, and I wish I could say that when I was going through all that crappy stuff last year, that I still knelt down and praised God every day. I can't say that. I'm pretty sure there were plenty of days in there where I asked a lot of "why me?".

Of course, I wouldn't go back and tell myself how wonderful life would be now-- I really feel there were times when I relied entirely on God and my friends, and if I knew it would be okay, I might not have done that. I would have thought I could do it all myself. But now, I thank God every day. I can say that honestly. I thank God for providing all of these wonderful things to me for the time being, and for being in control of my life. I know without a doubt that I would not be where I am now without Him. It's one of my life goals to remember that always.

Now I leave you with the lyrics. Here is the song, available on YouTube.

Before the Morning by Josh Wilson

Do you wonder why you have to
Feel the things that hurt you
If there's a God who loves you, Where is He now

Maybe there are things you can't see
And all those things are happening
To bring a better ending

Someday, somehow you'll see, you'll see

Would you dare, would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
So hold on, you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning

My friend, you know how this all ends
You know where you're going
You just don't know how you'll get there
So say a prayer

And hold on, cause there's good for those who love God
But life is not a snapshot
It might take a little time but you'll see the bigger picture

Would you dare, would you dare to believe
That you still have a reason to sing
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It can't compare to the joy that's coming
So hold on, you gotta wait for the light
Press on and just fight the good fight
Cause the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning

Once you feel the weight of glory
All your pain will fade to memory

It's just the hurt before the healing
Oh, the pain that you've been feeling
It's just the dark before the morning

2 comments:

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